04-09-2015, 07:23 PM
I personally find it fascinating how different cultures deal with death and dying. The nine-night tradition is indeed different than what most of us are used to. I remember very well going to my first wake - they are a party, the family prepares all the food, the entire community joins in. I first thought it was a celebration of the loved one but I've been told that while that might be, its also superstitious - the bigger and better the party the more the duppy will not want to return to "haunt" the loved ones left behind.
I've yet to go to a grave digging but I understand that's quite the party too. I have a friend that had the honor of painting inside the burial hole - a different image for each side. And the "parade" with the band on the truck I find joyous - someone took a video of my neighbor's funeral procession, ending up in the yard where she was to be buried - her sons lifted her coffin and danced around - it was a joyous tribute to a lovely and lively woman. It is similar to the second-line tradition in New Orleans.
Muslims are not the only ones who shroud (bury in cloth) - Jews do as well but we also put our loved one in a coffin - a plain pine box, the plainer the better. The idea behind this is quick assimilation into the ground - ashes to ashes, dust to dust. We do not embalm our loved ones rather, we are mandated to bury them within 24 hours. We don't mark our graves until a year after the death. Our funerals are simple and short - we sit Shiva - that is we take a week immediately after the funeral where we do nothing - we cover the mirrors in the house, food is brought to us and we are supposed to sit on wooden boxes. The idea is to focus on our grief in a concentrated period and at the end of the week get up, brush ourselves off and get on with the living of life.
I embrace all forms of practice when it comes to death - it is the one thing in life that remains a mystery and the customs and practices of different cultures help each both send their loved ones off in the best fashion for their belief of the "after life" and for the mourners to best handle their grief with ritual and community.
I've yet to go to a grave digging but I understand that's quite the party too. I have a friend that had the honor of painting inside the burial hole - a different image for each side. And the "parade" with the band on the truck I find joyous - someone took a video of my neighbor's funeral procession, ending up in the yard where she was to be buried - her sons lifted her coffin and danced around - it was a joyous tribute to a lovely and lively woman. It is similar to the second-line tradition in New Orleans.
Muslims are not the only ones who shroud (bury in cloth) - Jews do as well but we also put our loved one in a coffin - a plain pine box, the plainer the better. The idea behind this is quick assimilation into the ground - ashes to ashes, dust to dust. We do not embalm our loved ones rather, we are mandated to bury them within 24 hours. We don't mark our graves until a year after the death. Our funerals are simple and short - we sit Shiva - that is we take a week immediately after the funeral where we do nothing - we cover the mirrors in the house, food is brought to us and we are supposed to sit on wooden boxes. The idea is to focus on our grief in a concentrated period and at the end of the week get up, brush ourselves off and get on with the living of life.
I embrace all forms of practice when it comes to death - it is the one thing in life that remains a mystery and the customs and practices of different cultures help each both send their loved ones off in the best fashion for their belief of the "after life" and for the mourners to best handle their grief with ritual and community.
"Once in a while you can get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right..."
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