[macyoder]

Many are unaware of the plight of the women or what they might be up against in these situations. I know many women move in the man's yawd, so very little support from his family. If the guy is well off with money, taking a good beating might be a price a woman might be encouraged to take. Its very frightening for those in it or those who think the cops are a call away .

[Raine]

(07-22-2014, 11:52 AM)macyoder Wrote:  Raine2, I grew up it where it happened or condoned. See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Sometimes I intervene or simply scream fire in my best American accent. The key is to bring awareness and support when possible.

For those who were born and raised there, most of what you experience is from people you know and love. Once you move away then it's a bit different but the first beating or lick you see or experience won't be from a total stranger.

I am friendly with a Jamaican at University and some of the stories she would tell me about her Dad abusing their Mom and them.......horrific. She said they never saw it as abuse until untilher Mom migrated to Canada.....she just accepted it as they did something wrong so they were beaten. Mom got herself straighten out return marry Dad, guess he thought he could continue with the abuse.....he was arrested for child abuse when he beat her brother and broke his arm...school got involved. Parents no longer together Dad is still bitter and mad no remorse she says she has forgiven him he does not know any better. She suggested he go get counselling he hiss his teeth and said tthat is white people thing....SMDH..her Mom remarry different race she said the day her Dad said her Mom is a whore because she remarry a non black she said that was the day I cut him off. He can no longer control and abuse them and she was the only one that would visit him.

[macyoder]

(07-23-2014, 05:48 AM)Raine2 Wrote:  Dad said her Mom is a whore because she remarry a non black she said that was the day I cut him off. He can no longer control and abuse them and she was the only one that would visit him.

Being called a whore or seen as a prostitute is one of the reasons Jamaica is no longer a place I wish to take my own family. I was propositioned within ear shot of my kids and husband. My last two trips were solo. Majority of my family have migrated so a visit for them is not a must. Certain amount of forgiveness is needed because no one said, no you cant treat a female a certain way.

There is a long list of not knowing from what abuse is to rape. This is compounded by not having any place to go.

FB Group - Jamaicans United Against Violence and Child Abuse.

[macyoder]

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20140720/lead/lead1.html

"According to these women, a man is justified in hitting his woman if she goes out without telling him, if she neglects the children, if she argues with him, if she refuses him sex, if she burns the food, or if she is unfaithful."

[Raine]

(07-23-2014, 10:39 AM)macyoder Wrote:  http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20140720/lead/lead1.html

"According to these women, a man is justified in hitting his woman if she goes out without telling him, if she neglects the children, if she argues with him, if she refuses him sex, if she burns the food, or if she is unfaithful."

These women are lower down the educational ladder.....or totally dependent on these men......so sad damn if the do and damn if the dont

[macyoder]

A joke but also sad reality to what the article referred to:

Three ladies, an American, a British and a Canadian went to a women conference and decided to return home and require more of their husbands. After 3 weeks they should return with an update.

The American returned saying, I went home and told my hubby I wasn't going to cook anymore. The first week, she did not see anything, the second week she did not see anything but the third week, he hired a maid and severed her breakfast in bed.

The British returned saying, she told her husband she was not going to clean anymore. The first week she did not see anything, the second seek she did not see anything, but the third week a maid service was hired and lovely dinner was arranged.

Weeks went by and nothing from the Jamaican lady. She finally returned and said, well , mi gu home and tell mi man, mi naw cook or clean anymore. First week mi couldn't see nuthing, second week mi couldn't see nuting, but di third week mi could see a likkle bit outa di right eye.

Yes, I know this is not ALL but there is a huge problem with no way out for some women!

[macyoder]

Why I don't hit my kids because it could (NOT ALWAYS) what you teach them to accept from others.

" "The notion that you flog children because you want the best for them is at play here. If you are socialised to think that corporal punishment is an act of love, these same people grow up … and believe that if you hit me, it's because you love me, because you could have walked away."

[goldilocks]

My heart goes out to all victims of abuse. It's a hard thing to change a man's perspective in that regard. I was pushed once by my baby father and I pushed back. He tried to swing a lamp at me and I told him "Swing It!" He didn't. He threatened to throw a cinder block through my car window while I was in the car and I screamed "Throw it!" He didn't. This was over 20 years ago.

My size allows me to look a six foot plus man in the eye, which has probably saved me a lot of grief since I am not in the least, and never will be, a submissive female. I'm quiet, low maintenance, an excellent cook and housekeeper and hold down a decent job. I require the same excellence from a partner (probably why I'm single today). I also am well versed in hot grits, cast iron skillets and things of that nature. My favorite line when faced with potential violence is "OK, but don't sleep m*****f***er." I do offer a warning before I act, which thankfully has been very rare. I am blessed to be able to stand up to these types of so-called men and walk away unharmed.

[jitterbug]

i've seen and heard some horrid things in jamaica, i can still "hear" a woman being beat down the road by her man . . .

a couple of stays ago, while at bar b barn, in the early morning hours, i heard a woman being beat by a man in the lane between the barn and barry's . . . saw her and her child the next day. my heart hurt!!!! . . .

i feel for the women, children and animals of jamaica!!!

at the same time, a lot of violence against women here at home too.
the difference is that we have a lot of services available for the women and children.

no service available in jamaica!!

[ohliz]

The bystanders and the one filming? Wow. Modern day Kitty Genovese.

Quote:For those who were born and raised there, most of what you experience is from people you know and love.

This is true all over the world, most women and children are abused - physically, sexually, mentally - by people closest to them. Opportunity is probably the main reason. Far more Uncle Jimmy/Pastor Tom/Father John pedophiles than Stanley the Stranger pedophiles.

And of course most women who are beaten are by their own husbands and boyfriends (and fathers...).

The lack of outside help is a huge concern. Our "system" here in the US is certainly imperfect but at least there IS a system of gov't bureaucracy, privately run shelters and the like.