Gosh you guys really put a lot of pressure on a person. But since you have been so long-suffering waiting for a report, Iâ€m going to give it a run. Problem in Iâ€m going to have to edit myself – and no, Iâ€m not giving all the detail nor the names. That being said. . . .
Got to our home-away-from-home and started to settle in. It was good to see familiar faces. Iâ€m SURE this is going to be a great stay now that “he†has been banished, Iâ€m sure it will all run smoothly. Oh wait, we are in Jamaica and nothing is as it seems. Go to our rooms and - - no cable, no TV. My lawd, isnâ€t this how my last stay here started? “There are no more TVâ€s†OH GOD kill me now, this is a rerun, a bad rerun. Iâ€m ready to pack my bags, Iâ€m not putting up with this again. I storm off. Sophie stayed and worked some things out. There would be a TV available on Mon-Tue (I forget) and cable guy wouldnâ€t be back until then. Okay, Iâ€ll stay till then but if there is any more slackness, Iâ€m leaving. I really donâ€t care if I have a TV and cable but itâ€s Richieâ€s vacation too and I knew heâ€d really like it.
It was that in-between time too- late for lunch and too early for supper so we decided to head to Hammonds for a little bite. Iâ€m in line, starting to give my order and a Jamaican woman shoulders me aside, or I should say TRIED to shoulder me aside. Iâ€m having none of it. This is not my first time at the dance and Iâ€m tired of the rudeness (oh lawd itâ€s only day one). I gave as good as I got and got suck-teeth for my effort. Too bad little miss, you have messed with the wrong tourist this time.
I have no idea which days were sunny and which rainy. After 23 trips, I just donâ€t keep track. Let it be known that most days were sunny, not too hot, sea was calm in the mornings and mostly rough in the afternoon. Just typical Spring in Negril. I think I do remember only one day being a total rain day and that was the day before we left. I never mind it then, because it gives me a reason to leave.
Our first full day there was spent getting settled in. Gotta make sure we have the kitchen stocked. That evening there was going to be karaoke at Travellers. The four of us decided to check it out. I really couldnâ€t believe it myself. Smokey and Sophie NEVER go out at night. We decided weâ€d go ahead and eat dinner there too.
I had to make everyone pose for photos because we VERY seldom get cleaned up and go out. This might have been only the second time Richie and I have gotten Sophie and Smokey out for an entire evening. (Someday Iâ€ll have to tell you the story about the 1st time we got them to go to a show at Roots.)
Oh wait, I forgot to say that Iâ€d met someone from the boards while swimming that afternoon. She is our kind of people so we invited her along. Now there were 5. We get to Travellers, got a table right by the sea. It is really beautiful there. Nice view of Negril and the 7 mile beach and the sunset. We got our menus and about fell out. Geez their prices were high. Then I think it was Smokey who asked “Donâ€t you have just sandwiches or fried chicken (this was early in the trip, we still wanted chicken) or something?†Good thing he asked – they brought out lunch menus. Now that was more like it. I got the conch burger and it was the best Iâ€ve had since I lived in the Bahamas!
People started coming in, music was starting, and singers with the karaoke company were doing some warm up songs – Gospel music. Not exactly what we were looking for. But we hung in there. People came and joined our table and the party grew. Then people from the “other†board came in and you could feel the tension start. People who had sat down at our table couldnâ€t wait to get away before being seen with us. Oh god it was funny.
Now other singers started getting up – but dang, doesnâ€t anyone know how to sing reggae? People started dancing (well I use that term loosely when speaking of one individual who more or less grabs her breasts and lifts her leg to anyone who will watch – yes, she always wears a dress). They started dancing with each other, then with each otherâ€s significant others, then three of them “dancing†together. It was really a train wreck you couldnâ€t look away from.
Since one of the people coming to sing was coaxed there (by someone who didnâ€t show up) with the promise of a free drink by some of her fans, I decided to put one on my tab. Yes, I said tab! Iâ€ve NEVER run a tab in Jamaica. I didnâ€t even know it was possible. Our waiter, since dinner, was taking care of us and I made sure he knew to put this personâ€s first drink on my tab. This person a little later in the evening said sheâ€d had three drinks and just wanted to make sure she understood that I was paying for one. “Yes, I told the waiter to put your first one on my tab.†I could tell that she expected me to pick up the three drinks but that wasnâ€t happening. Like Smokey likes to say “I was born at night, but it wasnâ€t last night.†I know how the running are and I donâ€t play that shit. If people want to move to Jamaica, wonderful, but donâ€t expect me to foot your bills while Iâ€m there.
We continued to have a pretty interesting evening but it was well past our bedtime so the five of us head out. It was such fun having our 5th person. It was just like the many trips when we had another buxom blond in our group. We now have our new “girlie†(and not in a creepy way – we donâ€t hang that way – unlike some of the people we would meet on this trip – NO Iâ€m not giving names).
As we reach YB and head off to our rooms, our newest member gets a call. . . but itâ€s for me. “Tell Pineapple she forgot to pay her tab.†“Oh shit!†Richie and I hurry back. Iâ€m so embarrassed. We walk up to the bar where the waiter and a manager are standing. They were very understanding. He showed me my tab. “You had one Smirnoff Ice, then two rounds of rum and oj, making for 5 drinks.†“Yes, thatâ€s right.†But then he shows me another receipt for a half fifth bottle of J&B. “The rasta put this on your tab.†“No way, I never authorized that, I bought one drink for the woman. I just met her rasta tonight and I donâ€t buy drinks for strangers.†“Well actually the woman told him to put it on your tab.†“Well, then I guess you need to go back to the woman and get her to buy HER rastaâ€s drink.â€
Itâ€s starting already. One day into a 14 day trip and Iâ€m pissed at have of Negril.
PS: Travellerâ€s has the most beautiful bathrooms in Jamaica.