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JA on funerals and death - JonTom - 09-14-2014
There have been prior posts discussing (some) JA habits on death, funerals, and graves.
Things like cell phone photos of bodies on the ground, some of the colorful/whimsical gravestones, etc.
It is always interesting to note, and try to understand cultural habits different from one's own. Add this to my list:
"A group of exuberant attendees jumped into the hearse."
Jump into a hearse before a funeral??? What the what? and they look like grand marshalls at a parade. Color me confused.
"Funeral attendees rush Roger’s casket in Savanna la mar"
http://www.jamaicaobserver.com/news/Funeral-attendees-rush-Roger-s-casket-in-Savanna-la-mar
RE: JA on funerals and death - DAWN - 09-16-2014
Saw this come through on my fb feed today.
http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20140916/lead/lead81.html
RE: JA on funerals and death - Westenders - 09-16-2014
(09-16-2014, 10:46 AM)DAWN Wrote: Saw this come through on my fb feed today.
http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20140916/lead/lead81.html
Very Mexico City.....
I'm also thinking about similarities to Cuba, where we saw lots of streets lined with large concrete portraits of young men who have died.
RE: JA on funerals and death - rootswoman - 09-16-2014
It is interesting.
I took a really great philosophy class in college "On Death and Dying" the first part of the class was exploring death in various cultures and the second half was all about euthanasia .
I loved that class
When I lived in Greece several of my in-laws passed away. I got to know the ropes but the first death really shook me up - the way the Greeks dealt with death was so different than then anything I had experience it in the USA.
My x father in law was the first to go. My mother in law was devastated. They did not embalm the bodies like we do, they hold the funeral as soon as possible, it is a hot country so it is usually in about 24 hours. The tradition is to lay the corpse out in the middle of the living room of the deceased home. The family sits with the body and does not go to bed - they stay up all night keeping company with the corpse and receiving guests.
Nobody eats- they drink Turkish coffee and Greek Brandy (Metaxa) and maybe nibble on some dry biscuits. Finally morning comes, and people start gathering for the funeral procession. They are in quite a state after no food or sleep.
The casket is first carried to the church. The family and friends follow behind the casket. The woman are dressed head to toe in black - the men wear black arm bands. The people wail. They are really loud and they let it all out. (I can tell you it feels pretty good to be able to wail as loud as you want and it is normal behavior)
After the ceremony at the church, the procession continues to the burial site. There is a lot of grave side drama with people wailing and crying. My mother in law tried to jump into the open grave to join he husband - we had to stop her!
After the burial people go and have a big meal all together.
There are many ceremonies and traditions after the burial - there was something at 9 days and something else in 40 days. (if I remember correctly) During these times everyone gathers at the grave. After nine years they have another ceremony where they dig up the bones and move them to a box in the cemetery . They then recycle the grave and use it for someone else for 9 years.
It was funny (well not really funny.....) but when my daughters boyfriend passed in Jamaica I cried really loud in the Sav la Mar hospital. I saw people looking appalled at my crying and asked me what was wrong . (Duh!) I was so devastated that such a strong seemingly healthy young man was suddenly gone. (he died from meningitis - which he caught at the hospital)
Having been through several funerals in Greece I sort of thought their way was normal in "foreign" I was sure wrong. Later, a Jamaican friend took me aside and said "you really mus-tent cry like that in Jamaica - crying is a weakness"
I feel sorry for Jamaicans - it is so much better to wail as loud as you want than to hold it all in.
RE: JA on funerals and death - Westenders - 09-16-2014
What an interesting post and account of The Greek dying and funeral process. I love learning about different cultural traditions, very interesting Miss RW.
Totally relate to your friends comment about crying and weakness in Jamaica. I am a big softie in happy and sad times and my hubby always gives me the stare and says " no bodder cry"...he knows when it's coming lol...
How sad for your daughter and your family, I hope she is ok, and I'm sure expressing grief is better for all of us.
RE: JA on funerals and death - rootswoman - 09-16-2014
Thank you for your kind words and concerns W.E.
It was several years ago. Anthony was a Jamaican and my daughter was in college in the USA . She would fly to Jamaica whenever she could. She had a hard time for awhile after that, but she is back on track now.
All I can say is never go to that hospital. It was like something out of a Stephan King novel. Patients, who didn't have their own sheets, were laying on brown vinyl covered mattresses with the vinyl ripped and worn and the stained foam stuffing exposed. Talk about a bed of germs! (I wont describe any more of the gory details as the memories are too painful)
RE: JA on funerals and death - JonTom - 09-16-2014
Thank you RW, for the description. Cultures are certainly different.
I noted, later, that some comments on the Roger Clarke funeral article were disapproving of some persons'
behavior. Others disagree.
RE: JA on funerals and death - Schuttzie - 09-17-2014
That is very interesting about the Greeks. In Puerto Rico there are very large ornate cemeteries with big sculptures. We were driving back to our rental one day and there was a procession of vehicles up and down the lane for a funeral burial (a lot of cars). It would be interesting to study other cultures and how they deal with death.
Thank you, RW for sharing, Bless!
RE: JA on funerals and death - macyoder - 09-17-2014
"Later, a Jamaican friend took me aside and said "you really mus-tent cry like that in Jamaica - crying is a weakness"
My experience going to funerals in Jamaica is about ban (hold) yuh belly and bawl, throwing yourself on top of the casket going in the ground, plus a few fights along the way. There is the expression, live like a pauper, buried like a king, so the funeral is sometimes about the family showing off. My mother will call ," lawd mi dear so and so ded poor ting". This is a person she hasn't seen or spoken to in decades yet she is devastated. Anytime I go on FB and see pictures of my relatives all dressed up looking nice, I know it's a funerals. Its the only time many living abroad bother to return. They will keep the body until everyone can afford that ticket. Recently the funeral came about a month after the passing. My friend and her daughter got buried three weeks later. I leaned you can buy a package from the mortuary so there isn't a daily charge to keep the body. The only thing the Jamaicans I know do harder than cry over the dead is fuss. For my age , I have been to too many funerals. Too many, gone too soon.
I am shock at how quickly American bury the dead.
RE: JA on funerals and death - Likkle Red - 09-18-2014
Rootswoman, you are so right with the sav hospital if you can call it a hospital. Have had many loved ones there and hate to say this but none have left alive or they have sent them home to die within hours of discharge. If you want your loved one to be comfortable you must provide sheets, pillows, food, snacks, water container, pjs, towels, soap, deoderant and of course their medication.
My friend lost his mother in sav hospital and they so ehow misplaced the body as their morgue cooler was not working. We finally found her at a funeral home wrapped in the sheet she died on and laying on a huge slab of ice. We were expected to peel her off the ice, as the sheet had stuck, and load her into the hearse that came for her. Talk about an experience!